New Year? Bringing the pain.

Okay, the new year means good things for you, blog town.

I am determined this year to get shit done. (Hopefully right but I’m not making any promises.) As I was reflecting over my past year of glory, I realized, sure, things have been swell but what about the knitting? You can only stray so far from your roots before remembering you have roots… and they don’t go anywhere. (That’s like essential roots theory there.)

So this year, I am making a solemn vow. If there were blood here, I’d make a blood oath. My stash is going to get knit the fuck up people. If it doesn’t, I’m going to burn it. (…or give it away like a sane person, or someone going into a monastery.) I’ve even started an internet campaign full of like-minded people to keep me honest. Heh. You can follow along if you’re interested: Stash Killers.

I also knit some crap for people for Christmas. All using stash yarn. I’m just a G like that.

First up, I knit my mom a shawl. She said she wanted a shawl and I figured, okay, if it’s something she specifically says she wants, she has to love it.

I think she kind of loved it.

It was the Simple Yet Effective Shawl and I’ve got to say, that sucker lives up to its name. I added some random yo’s to keep it interesting for myself but it ended up being relatively enjoyable. I used yarn that a lady gave me from my knitting group. It was an intense wool. Read as: real wool. It raked my hands over good. I really need to stop taking in any more wool, especially BFL. So yeah, noted.

I also made a coworker a hat. But because I’m a genius I didn’t get any pictures of him wearing said hat. So, you get my crazy face.

There are plenty of pictures where I’m not making such a disgusting face… but those pictures aren’t real enough and you know how I like to keep it real. [cough]

Anyways, the pattern is by my super awesome internet buddy: Teekay [rav link] and it’s her Fenced In hat. I freaking love it. I also had to do it freaking 3 times because

1) I am a moron.

2) You really need to print out any pattern that has charts. (See #1.)

Gorgeous, right?

I had goals for last year and I actually accomplished a lot of them. But I missed you, blog buddies and I think 2011 is going to be a good time for our reunion. So stay with me. We’re going to do this thing up. (Hopefully right. Like I said, I’m really not promising anything.)

Two Cookies, no fat

You really can’t listen to anything I say. When I say I won’t post in November because I’m writing, well that’s a lie. Because once I announce anything to the World that automagically kills it. My life is amazing like that. I can’t post a book I’m reading on Goodreads or I suddenly become illiterate. I can’t tell you all about upcoming projects or I’ll probably accidentally set fire to all my yarn or something. *ohdeargodnoknockonwood*

I have a sweet internet buddy who I’m friends with on Ravelry. She made some super sexy mitts so I messaged her and when she messaged back she asked, still no wips?

Well crap, I guess not. Everything I’ve worked on has been dormant or it’s super quick and not really a work in progress so much as just happening. However I did finally bind off on a new sock and it was a new technique and everything. Elizabeth Zimmerman’s sewn bind off. Which I heard from Michelle, the sock queen, is a good way to bind off your toe up socks. Who knew?

Leaving me with two Cookie A. socks. Both without mates and they’re probably not going to get them any time soon. On the left is Rick, which I started this summer but got bummed out on. On the right is my recently finished Hedera. While I love the pattern and I love the Cherry Tree Hill yarn, I don’t think the two sit well with each other.

Plus the two together make me think of Christmas and the knitting I should do for that which makes me want to barf.

Also thanks a lot Fall for making the sun go away so early so I can’t get any good pictures outside anymore.

I did finish my first gift… but it’s for my mom and since she’s kind of picky about things, I probably won’t give it to her since it’s huge and she’s tiny and she probably won’t like it. FAIL.

Since I’ve never seen my mom wear a hat in the Winter, I decided to make her a head band. Well I restarted this sucker a few times because it was HUUUUGGGGGEEE. Even modified it’s still freaking gigantic. However, the Malabrigo was nice to work with, despite it being wool and the pattern is cool: Calorimetry. That is, if you’re into huge ass head bands. Which I think I kind of am. Huh.

Win!

I hope you all want to see a smug ass face.

Yes, I finally have my very own Clapotis! Sure, everyone and their mother has knit one. But did they knit theirs with their very own yarn baby? Speaking of said baby, it really is beautiful. I’m not going to lie- I wasn’t 100% sold on it when I bought it. There was some buying peer pressure happening. Once it was rolled up into a beautiful cake I saw the allure of Briar Rose. The colors are freaking eye popping gorgeous. Plus when you feel it, well, it certainly doesn’t feel like wool. (Which may be a good or bad thing depending on who you are.) So all of this combined is enough to get a big old smug face from me. Plus there’s just something about dropped stitches that beg to have their picture taken from every angle imaginable.

It was such a satisfying knit! The pattern called for size 8′s but I went with what the yarn recommended because I figured since the dropped stitches were going to be huge, no sense in having big crazy stitches. While I like the stitches and the way the fabric feels, it made the scarf very wide and not very long. (More a shawl or “stole” than a scarf.) Plus at the end I thought I would run out of yarn so I didn’t do one repeat… and of course I had more than enough yarn left. It was deceptively dense in the middle. I need to stop winding stuff so there’s like a fist of yarn in the middle. Although I don’t think I wound this one, so I’m going to pass the buck on that.

Which reminds me of this quote that my friend liked from that movie Closer: “Have you ever seen a human heart? It looks like a fist wrapped in blood.”

This picture is pretty goofy but I figured, what the heck? I’m so excited about this project. I’ve pretty much knit it for a month solid to get it done. Everything was jiving, the yarn was great, the pattern amazing, the needles were making stereotypical clicking noises. I just kept losing steam and wouldn’t touch it for a day or two because I’ve had some severe attention problems lately. Watch movies? Read? Listen to music? Go outside since the chance of it being nice is 50/50- so much awesome stuff to do.

Wait- I mean, crap. Now they’re going to revoke my blogging license. Did I just say that I’ve not been knitting because there’s just too much awesome stuff to do in life? My life is just so freaking great all the time that it’s hard to focus on anything for any extended period of time. I’m thinking if this blog attests to anything it’s that I have craft project ADD. I started thinking about all of the projects I’ve started lately that I don’t even talk about. Like, for a foolish month I thought I’d try my moms craft and cross stitch something. The cats stopped that. Then my friend Miranda helped me get fabric to sew up an apron and a dress. When she asks about my progress all I can do is look sheepish.

Have you missed pictures of my cats? Because this one has definitely missed being in front of the camera.

big time bad news

Do you know what has stopped me from completely melting into a puddle of lamesauce? You guys. The other day when I was talking out loud to John to try to motivate myself to do stuff by listing out what I need to do I said “I need to take pictures to put on my blog or else they’ll think I’m a slacker.” They? The internet! Don’t you realize what serious business this is? If someone on the internet thinks I’m a slacker well then that’s big time bad news.

A while back I traded yarn with my Granma. She sent me this really nice purple alpaca/wool blend. Well I sat and looked at that yarn and asked it what it wanted to be and it sat and stared back at me. So when I broke my yarn buying resolution two days into the new year it was actually to buy some yarn to go with the purple yarn.

Speaking of resolutions, all of mine are effectively broken. Well, I’m still hoping to lose some weight or at least get in something that can be considered “in shape” (meaning not the blob monster I feel like recently or that Wii Fit confirms I am). This winter blah crap is not helping. All of the other resolutions though are caput. Although I’m still trying to not buy yarn unless it’s necessary because I’m saving up for… something we’ll talk about in the future here. Plus when I walk in my closet it cries. The yarn actually cries at me. “Lindsey,” it says sniffling, “you loved us enough to buy us, why won’t you make us into something beautiful?” Closet guilt trip, yeesh.

So I made a hat!

It is a seriously goofy hat too. It comes to a sort of Pope hat point. It’s also pretty big considering I cut out some rows and knit it on some small needles. If I were to knit this hat again, which I might because I’m curious- I would switch out the colors. Make the purple the main color and the white the contrast. I think that might make me like it more.

While I’m glad to have finished something, I’m kind of ‘enh’ towards the outcome. Story of my life right now! I need to get out and get active, that’ll hopefully make me less of a Grumpy Gus. I hate sitting around focusing on how fat I am, how nothing I knit looks right or pleases me and how I haaate what I’m reading. Well I think things have at least turned around there because I’m finally done with stupid Wuthering Heights. Sorry if you love that book but it just killed my happiness. Okay, I’m done hatin’ and being lame, at least I hope so!

I still have a ball of the purple and of the white left, I don’t know- should I knit another hat only reverse or should I think about making some mittens? Hrm.

Also have you guys listened to Feed the Animals by Girl Talk? Do it!

Watch out!

I never thought I’d get any of these projects I’ve been working on done… they seriously just felt like they were never going to get done. However, even though I was pushing it right up to the last possible minute before last nights mystery sock class, I did manage to get mom’s socks done. (The socks I’m giving her for Christmas. So suck it Christmas monster!)

I think they came out pretty great! Although the tension in the second sock is way wonky, it almost looks like there’s no pink. Which is funny because the whole time I was freaking out about not having enough purple. Ha ha ha. I had a whole baby fist of purple left.

My favorite part is definitely the striped heels and mismatched heel flaps. Because I came up with those all on my own! I think it makes the socks look a lot louder than they probably should be, which might not have been a great idea for socks for my mom… but she’s pretty crazy, so her socks should reflect that- don’t you think?

Hey everybody it’s the yin-yang twins! Oooooooooooh, pretty cheesy, right?

But the only real problem, besides all the tension wonkyness is that mom’s socks, mysteriously, fit me perfectly:

Watch out mom, I’m coming for them.

Gratuitious Knit Shots

So yeah, I probably shouldn’t post pictures since they’re all “half done” and that’s what really ruins the full done effect since it’s like… yeah so? We’ve already seen a million pictures of that torturous lace. But I feel like I’ve been running dry around here lately. Maybe it’s because it’s been a year since I started this thing and I only have a year in me per blog. If that. o__O

Or maybe it’s because I’m l-a-z-y. Either way, here are my half done shots:

I’m loving the pattern… about two repeats back though I realized, you know what would have made this better? If I’d held the yarn double. Also, it would have made lace better for me in general if I didn’t have the attention span of a goldfish. Er, whoops. There are some big mistakes… but I’m thinking this scarf/stole thing is big enough that in the end it seriously doesn’t matter.

Okay, so this sock is kind of funny. It’s another mystery sock from Temptations. Called “Fade Away”. Well, I decided I’d finally really knit something for my mom. I always start out knitting stuff for her and then something big and dramatic happens and then next thing you know, the project doesn’t get finished… or it does and goes in the projects I hate but won’t get rid of pile. (Which resides under the bed with about two pounds of cat hair.)

Well socks are a different story. With socks they’re such a labor, even if they’re fun and you love them that you have to give them to that person… because they’re that persons size and it’s weird to hang onto socks that don’t fit you. So I’m playing fast and loose with the yarn because I’m like, she has a small foot, what’s the big deal? The picture isn’t representative but the foot, although when measured it’s an inch smaller than my foot, which is her size… actually fits me perfectly and looks like a monster foot compared to what my moms foot looks like.

At least it’s wool, it’ll shrink. I’m still just like WTF? That could be yarn that I could have saved! Because now I’m cutting it real real real close on this second sock. Real close.

Oh yeah… I had delusions of grandeur that I’d knit John a sweater for Christmas. Then his mom gave me a whole list of things that everyone would like to have and I’m like… well, I need an after Christmas project… right? Plus it doesn’t get super freaking cold until January anyways, amiright?

Anyways, it was my friend Heather’s last day at work last week and it made us all really sad because she rocks. Luckily we made a sweet ass friendship that should hopefully survive. (*knock on wood*) Anyways, since we’re obsessed with Sonic tots, we made our boss an honorary tot member:

He looks super freaking stoked, right? MonsterTot and FrankenTot.

When it rains it- well you know the rest.

::harumph::

There aren’t any words for poor little Friedrick’s profound sadness or deep feelings of rampant… angst. Wherever he goes something always seems to rain on his parade!

[Details]

Rainycloud from Mochimochiland. I honestly didn’t think I would get this guy done in time for the contest… however, I(‘m pretty sure I) did. I even felted him! (Although he looks a little, well, I’ll use the word lumpy but you can guess what I’m thinking the cloud kind of looks like o_O) This was also my first time using safety eyes, so I learned something from this experience too. I’m loving this little guy.

Another wonderful figure taken from my head and made a reality by:

Fun fact: knit while watching Sweeney Todd (so it’s nice and angstified) and Firefly (which is a whole different angry story).

A Daunting Task

When you’re a little one, sometimes the simplest things to everyone else are a pretty big task in your book. Speaking of books… as much as I love them, they don’t really help in the matter. I think it was when I was fifteen that I finally started to think that a witch wasn’t going to shove me in the oven anymore.

Even things like bathing make the most hearty and steadfast get a little weak in their knees.

Tubby, while cute and ‘bubbly’ is also a big intimidator to this little guy. However, it’s always a big comfort for me to take something that you might not enjoy and relate it back to a fun thing… like a day at the pool!

Details:

Tubby by Anna Hrachovec at Mochimochiland. These pictures are for the contest. My friend Crystal made this figure for me from a very specific picture I had in my head. You should check out her shop! Say you like to collect a specific thing, like, oh I don’t know, raccoons… (*cough*) and you think, man, I really want some raccoon stitch markers- well she will make you some. They will also be super adorable. If you tell her that you saw her shop ad here, she’ll probably even cut you a deal, since you’re a friend of a friend.

Scary Spooooky Tangents

Happy Halloween!

Pattern: Felted Pumpkins by Jordana Paige

Size made: small

Yarn: Cascade 220

Notes and Things: Has anyone seen Top Design on Bravo? There was a designer named Goil and I loved him, if only for the reason that he had cool glasses. He also had a sweet name and said “my name’s Goil, it’s like Gargoyle.” I’ve always wanted a gargoyle, ever since I was small and would watch the show Gargoyles. Thankfully Target had my wants and needs in mind when they started selling that bad boy in the picture.

What does any of that have to do with knitting? Nothing really. I’ve just been having a hard time coming up with a post lately. Not because I don’t have stuff and things to post. I have both stuff and/or things in abundance. As you can see, I finally finished that pumpkin! It was a fast knit, fun to felt and would’ve been done sooner if I didn’t have stuffing issues. Stuffing issues which led to a lopsided pumpkin. (I stuffed it, then the stuffing settled all weird, then while it was sitting around settling, it got all lopsided and I just sort of watched it happen. Huh.) However, it is a really fun knit and the second I saw it, I knew I had to knit it. Mostly because I have a love for all things pumpkin.

Have you ever been to the Circleville Pumpkin Show?

I go every year. Including this year, which was last week. I took this picture from the ferris wheel.

This house makes me feel alright about my love for pumpkins. It’s always good knowing that there’s someone else out there with a love that’s more crazy than yours. Unless you’re going for ultimate crazy person status, then second best feels a little crappy.

Reasons I love Halloween:

• Candy.
• It makes me appreciate Fall and how it’s the creepiest of all the seasons.
• Family can’t get pissed off about too much.
• It encourages people to get creative. For some people it’s to come up with an original outfit and for sorority girls it’s a new and original way to be slutty.
• Strategic candy game plans. I love it when kids do their homework on where to strike and at what time. (Or maybe me and my friend were just weird on this one.)

This felting nonsense

I love doing stuff the hobo way!

I know you’re supposed to felt stuff in like a washer… However, that takes forever and I wouldn’t have been able to use those freakishly huge spatula things. Seriously, what are those things even used for anyways? I figured, kitchen sink is good enough for dishes, which I eat off of, it should be good enough for a pumpkin I won’t be eating.

I’m a machine!

Also, sorry about the random dishes there. Yikes! Maybe I should actually do the dishes and quit the knitting. Nonsense, I say. So the pumpkin is close to being totally dry, it takes forever for wool to dry out. I’m going to stuff it tonight and I’ll hopefully have some completed pictures up for you later.

I was making good progress on the cat sweater, I decided to knit both sleeves at once. Since I don’t have two skeins though I was knitting out of both ends of the different colors and it became a giant knot. So, I’ve been slightly deterred from that. I think I’m also kind of in a weird place because I’m leaving next week and it seems like I have a lot of projects to do but I can’t think of any of them. Not good.

(My stem is a little long. The man of the house suggested pipe cleaners to hold it upright. Apparently duck tape and pipes cleaners are the staples in my husbands MacGuyver catalog.)